WHY I EAT -- AND WHY I WANT TO CHANGE WHY I EAT

EAT, EAT, EAT, EAT.....YES, I HAVE BEEN DOING IT ALL MY LIFE.

My whole life has revolved around food. Some of my fondest memories of childhood involve family times around the kitchen table....holiday meals, favorite foods my mom would make, my grandmother would make. Some of my favorite memories are at restaurants, potlucks, family celebrations that always involve a meal. What do you want for your birthday meal? What do we want for Thanksgiving dinner....Christmas dinner.....Fourth of July barbecue? It's summer....homemade ice cream and hotdogs (and S'mores!!)! Fall....first pot of chili and pumpkin soup. Winter....mmmmmm, hot chocolate and carrot cake. Spring.....well, I love a good salad when the weather warms up (it can't be all bad stuff). You get the picture. Everything, EVERYTHING involves food. I could go on and on about this.

And let's face it, that's not going to change. It's a part of human nature to socialize and share food. But I use food for so much more than socializing or staying alive. I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm depressed, I eat when I'm celebrating or proud of myself, I eat when I'm bored, I eat when I'm angry or frustrated. The only time I lose my appetite is when I'm physically sick, VERY angry (which rarely happens), or VERY sad (like grieving sad). I like to eat when I'm alone or with people. I like food. I like tasty food. But huh, I will eat it even if it's not that good.

My attitude toward food and eating needs to change. If I'm going to be healthy, if I'm going to be happier with myself and habits, if I'm going to be happy with a healthier lifestyle, I MUST change how I feel about eating. I MUST change how I see food and myself relating to it. I need to develop an "eat to live" not a "live to eat" attitude. I must change my brain, and it will be very difficult.

Like I said, eating is many times a social thing, and that's fine. Our family gathers around the dinner table almost every night, to relate to each other for the evening meal. I want to eat healthy, to be healthy, and to not keep eating and eating, just because I like to eat. Moderation in all things.

I really, really want food to be less important in my life. I want to focus on other things, alternatives to food for entertainment and comfort..... I want food to be for survival (although it can still be tasty...I do want to still enjoy what I eat). I just want to think and feel differently. Now how do I go about changing LIFELONG ATTITUDES?